Make the Words Act for Your Characters

By Elaine L. Orr

Words on a page do bring stories alive. Action words give them a reason to keep living.

As I wrote Rekindling Motives more than two decades ago, I concurrently took an online class in outlining a book -- something I don't do well. The instructor read portions of the book and thought the opening wouldn't grab a reader. Here's the original opening.

I had not intended to go to the Ocean Alley High School reunion.  Wait, that’s too mild.  I would have preferred to walk barefoot on the boardwalk in January.  However, Scoobie and Ramona combined their charms, and I was in the so-called ballroom of Ocean Alley’s largest hotel, Beachcomber’s Alley.

Here's what evolved based on the instructor's comments. (He may have said something about walking on glass, but I don't remember back to 2005. I'm lucky to have stored an early manuscripts in my Yahoo Mail account.)

I WOULD RATHER HAVE WALKED barefoot over shards of glass on the boardwalk in January than go to the Ocean Alley High School reunion. However, Scoobie and Ramona combined their charms, so on the Saturday after Thanksgiving I was in the so-called ballroom of Ocean Alley’s largest hotel, Beachcomber’s Alley. I'm such a wuss.

Several things changed, as you can tell.

• There's no reason to highlight the intention and then say Jolie's preference for an activity. The uncomfortable action she would rather not take is what counts.
• Walking barefoot over shards of glass on the boardwalk in January is a much better visual image than simply walking barefoot in the cold.
• The opening now indicates when the reunion takes place -- Thanksgiving weekend. 
• "I'm such a wuss" tells you that Jolie knows she can't always resist being browbeaten, but also that she can laugh at herself.

That lesson stayed with me and I reevaluate the first paragraph of each book many times.

More Ideas for Fresh Writing

Every author has her style and every character their distinct way of speaking. That said, we sometimes overuse words or use less precise ones. Not a crime, but here are some things to think about.

My critique group pointed out that I use 'look,' 'walk,' and 'and' a lot. I now do word searches for 'look' and 'walk.' You don't want to sound as if you swallowed a Thesarus, but someone who trudges up the steps after work conveys something different than the person who bounds up the stairs. (And not just that the bounder has better knees.)

As she reviewed draft chapters of The Handyman's Last Bite, my colleague Sue Ade counted the word 'and' 200 times in one chapter. Yikes! Upon review, I changed some longer independent clauses into two sentences, so no need to connect them with a conjunction. 

I also used 'and' when an infinitive could be used. For example, "She turned and hustled away," could be "She turned to hustle away." Either way is fine, but if you use 'and' 200 times in fifteen pages, look for at least some alternatives.

About that Outline...

All that outlining? As I got to the last couple of chapters of Rekindling Motives, my fingers flew as they do when I am very certain about my ideas. I didn't consult the outline, just kept moving. As you might imagine, the ending was different than I had outlined it. I liked the new ending. I might have liked the outline a bit better, but I wasn't going to rewrite two chapters that I thought worked well.

The moral could be: "Don't outline." It could also be, "It's OK to run with a good idea." My own habits have evolved such that I make notes before I start to write and I do bulleted summaries of each chapter as I go. At the bottom of my chapter summaries I have notes about continuing the story. Not an outline, but I do see my ideas on paper before I write the full text. I find that helpful.

As many writers say when asked for advice, stop talking and put your tail on the chair and do it.

                                                *                *                *                *

To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

More Attention to Shore Shenanigans

By Elaine L. Orr

In July of 2025 I published Fired up and Feisty, the first book in the Shore Shenanigans series. It is in the same Jersey shore town in which the Jolie Gentil series takes place. Ocean Alley, so named because the town is long and narrow.

I'd been preparing for the series for some time, which I don't always do. (I'd like to say I always plan ahead but it's not my best quality.) In this case, the character George in the Jolie Gentil series was a newspaper reporter who was fired in book 7 (of the 14) because he showed compassion in covering a story. He then worked for an insurance company as an investigator for two years, which helped him qualify to be a private investigator.

So, here comes PI George Winters.

Each book in the Shore Shenanigans Series features small groups of visitors to Ocean Alley, all of them staying at Mayor Madge's Cozy Corner B&B. As the primary sleuth, George discovers whatever is churning. 

He's usually paid to investigate more mundane things (think background checks for big corporations), so he's quick to dive into issues B&B guests bring with them to the Jersey Shore. A few familiar faces from other Jersey Shore books stroll in from time to time, but you won't see as much of them as in my other mystery series.

Fired Up and Feisty puts that year's Ocean Alley High School Reunion front and center. The Golden Grads (alums from long ago) end up at the Cozy Corner B&B after a fire at the hotel. Well, not all of them -- one is found on the floor in the room where the fire started. 

Did smoldering high school resentments lead to Preston McKinley's demise? Or maybe his prior business dealings? George Winters is pulled into the fray, assisted by Cozy Corner B&B owner Aunt Madge (a.k.a. Mayor Madge). With lots of input from snooty and down-to-earth seniors. 

Why Write About Fired Up and Feisty Now?

I've learned (the hard way?) that my books featuring amateur sleuths sell better than those in the two series with professionals -- Shore Shenanigans and the Logland Series, which has a female college town police chief as the main player.

Why? There is an established audience for cozy mysteries. There are not such audiences for private investigator and police chief mysteries written with a cozy feel. That's my marketing tagline. The books are certainly read and they get good reviews. But they are not purchased as much as my cozy series, and I like to sell books. That isn't being crass, just a reflection of wanting to put my time to good use.

But here's the thing. I never did a blog post about Fired Up and Feisty. Why not? Perhaps some subliminal messaging that told me it would be hard to write about a series that is a harder to categorize  Not too bright, right? Plus, I didn't notice until recently when I looked for such a post and didn't find one!

There's no time like the present. Fans of the Jolie Gentil series will enjoy the Shore Shenanigans series. Similar humor, occasional appearances by Jolie and Scoobie and their four-year-old twins, as well as George's long-time girlfriend, artist Ramona Argrow. Aunt Madge and her husband Harry, however, are very much front and center because much action takes place in their Cozy Corner B&B. 

In fact, I originally called it the Senior Shenanigans series, but I decided that was too narrow a group of reprobates for the stories.

Come back to Ocean Alley from a different perspective but similar mischief. Here are some places to find Fired Up and Feisty.

                     Amazon  Apple Nook  Everand  Google  Kobo  Smashwords

                                                *                *                *                *

To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

Picking a Profession for a New Sleuth

Elaine L. Orr

For my mystery series I have used a variety of sleuths. The long running Jolie Gently series has a real estate appraiser. I deliberately picked that so the job would put my amateur sleuth among people from all walks of life. Not just her homeowner or small business customers, but also real estate agents, local government officials who dealt with property law, merchants, and almost anything else you can think of.

For early stand alone books I learned lessons about limitations of given professions. For example, A teacher is tied to a classroom much of the time. Archeology is a fascinating profession, but it requires a lot of research on the writer's part. I like to do research, but I also like the story to flow easily.

The landscaper in the River's Edge series and the graphics artist in the Family History mystery series are also involved in many aspects of their communities. I like rural communities and I'm a family historian myself, which made those series especially interesting to me. 

Cozy Mystery readers expect an amateur sleuth. My two series without them are the Logland Mystery series, which features a female police chief in a small college town; and the Shore Shenanigans series, which introduced a private investigator (a man!) in a Jersey Shore town. Both of these series have many features of a cozy mystery series -- the murders occur off screen, the sleuth is involved in the community, and there's a fair bit of humor.

I learned that even though these two series are essentially cozies with a professional crime solver, readers aren't as likely to pick them up. I actually find them easier to write because the police chief and private investigator have a reason to delve into the crime. The amateur has a harder route to crime solving. But, I have to think hard about writing more books in the series. I love to write but I also love to sell.

As I was creating the Bay View Harbor series I needed a sleuth who had reasons to interact with a lot of people and yet had flexibility in her schedule. I always avoided professions that involved cooking, crafts, or (believe it or not) books. So no bakeries, yarn or other craft stores, or libraries or bookstores. I thought there were so many options already, and I also have no talents or cooking, sewing, or anything else that requires true talent. Libraries and bookstores seemed redundant -- I'm in them all the time.

In a small Maryland Eastern Shore town there aren't as many options as in a larger community. Thus came a former event planner turned bakery owner. I set it up so that she has a partner, which makes it easier to get around town, and the partner is actually a talented cook. I finally realized that a baker can get into as much trouble as a real estate appraiser or landscaper. I don't really have to know how to cook. I do have to like what I'm writing about, and Maryland's Eastern Shore is one of my favorite places on the planet. So, here we go.

                                                *                *                *                *

To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

Watch Out for Weak Words

By Elaine L. Orr

Some authors write gently, even with deep drama. I'm thinking of Ann Tyler. Others pack every metaphorical punch with swinging fists. Think James Patterson or John Sandford.

What's not good for either style is diluted text, especially verbs. "I was walking up the stairs after work" connotes a clearer image as, "I trudged up the steps after a long day at work." 

Another generic verb is look. We can look at a piece of paper or study it. Look at the sky or glance at it with deep concern. I now do a word search for 'look' at the end of my first draft. 

For my writing style, gerunds have a specific purpose. I like to use them to convey immediacy -- "walking into the deserted house confirmed my fears" puts you with the character more than "I walked into the house feeling fearful." You can edit either of those sentences, but I think constant use of gerunds dilutes their sense of immediacy, perhaps even intimacy, with a character.

My critique mate, Sue, pointed out that I used 'and' a lot. I didn't think so until I counted -- almost 200 times in one chapter. I had some longer sentences that could be separated without making the text choppy. But a big part was using 'and' rather than infinitives. Any style can work, but overuse becomes apparent.

I'll use another blog post to talk about how much more a colorful word conveys than a neutral one. Dropping to the floor is one thing. Crashing is something more. And louder.

                                                *                *                *                *

To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

From Both Sides of a State

By Elaine L. Orr

I'd written for decades before I decided to set a mystery series in Maryland, the state where I grew up and lived until my mid-forties. I didn't make a conscious choice to avoid my state of oceans and mountains. I suppose other venues seemed more interesting because I didn't know them as well.

Now I have not one but two series set in Maryland. The Family History Mystery Series is in Garret County, as far West as you can get. Living in the DC suburbs when I was a kid, people went to Garrett County to ski. I have friends who live in the Rockies who think 4,800 feet is not much of a mountain, but it's pretty tall when you're standing on a couple of pieces of wood going downhill. 

You don't have to go to the top of a mountain. One of the best ways to view the county is on the Capital Limited, the train that runs from Chicago to DC's Union Station. You ride along the water, seeing vistas that hikers or white water rafters could access -- but not the rest of us!

My hobby of genealogy research led to creating an amateur sleuth who is an active family historian and active with other local historians. What's been fun is to get to know the region and its Civil War history better. That isn't part of every book, of course. The Maryland battle of Antietam early in the war stopped the Confederate Army advance into Maryland, essential to prevent Washington DC from being surrounded by enemies of Lincoln's Union.

Heading to Maryland's Eastern Shore

The Chesapeake Bay is the largest estuary in the United States. If you're on a boat in the middle of the bay you might as well be on the ocean -- no shore in sight. 

The Western shore is readily accessible from the DC suburbs, which is why a friend and I bought a cottage there in the mid-1980s. It's beautiful, but has a sense of being anchored to the land that you don't get from the Eastern shore.

I selected Talbot County for the fictional town of Bay View Harbor. It's midway down the western part of the Eastern shore with plenty of shoreline. Lots of history to learn about, and I like to blend local history into much of what I write. I planned to spent time re-exploring the area, but a back injury marred the plans. I have a strong sense of the culture of the places from past visits and now a good excuse to spend more time there (with a healed back).

The books are cozy mysteries and the focus of town life is a bakery. I never thought I'd pick that profession, but when I was looking for a job for a new sleuth, it offered a way to interact with a lot of people and still have time to get into trouble and investigate. The Handyman's Last Bite comes out in May. 

I'm excited to work on The Art Critic's Last Forgery, I love art museums and relating artwork to the history of the period. If you look at the covers, you'll see they show the interior of the bakery with the harbor in the background. Now, on to learning more about forgeries.

                                                                *      *      *      *      *
Elaine now has two mystery series set in Maryland. To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

Maryland Looking Back and Forward

By Elaine L. Orr

Montgomery County, Maryland was a great place to grow up. Beaches to the east and mountains to the west. In the 1950s, the DC suburbs were growing rapidly as veterans and their families used the GI Bill to buy their first homes. Schools surged and the Catholic parish we belonged to got so big a new one was created down the street from us. My father, a Presbyterian, was a parish scout leader and oversaw the Sunday donut time.

It didn't seem odd to me to have Protestant, Catholic, and Jewish neighbors, a family that had recently arrived from Germany, and a native of Costa Rica who worked at the Organization of American States. It was only after I moved to the Midwest in the 1990s that I fully understood that most suburban neighborhoods were not as diverse. 

We didn't have Black neighbors in the 1950s and early 1960s, though my parochial school had a few Black students and I had Black teachers in high school. When my nieces and nephews played on the teams or cheered at my old high school, they would have thought it weird beyond belief not to have Black fellow students, friends, and teachers.

Our immediate neighbors included two families of Japanese descent. I didn't realize until I was an adult that they must have been interred during the War. Among my memories are that the family next store bought the same set of Golden Book Encyclopedias that our parents bought for us. Their very bright son read them cover-to-cover, while we referred to them on occasion.

The family across the street had an immaculate lawn and some neighbors grumbled that the family, especially the dad, didn't want people running across it. I remember my father saying very directly to another neighbor that it was their lawn and they could have it any way they wanted. Again much later, I realized my dad knew that they had likely had homes and possessions taken away and no one should criticize them for decisions about their property.

My parents bought their small house for $13,500. The homes in the neighborhood, Garrett Park Estates, now sell for millions. Of course, applying the concept of present value of money would mean the house (based on just that calculation) would have been worth more in 1951. But not that much!

In fact, my parents' former home was just sold and torn down so a developer could build a McMansion. The old home sold for $1.9 million. The new one has not been on the market, but I've seen pictures. In today's economy, I would assume $3.5 million or more.

Clearly, this would not be a neighborhood for first-time homebuyers today. Nor would the area near the  house I sold in Takoma Park, MD (for $194,000) in 1994. It's estimated to be work about $900,000 today. 

As I think about moving back to Maryland someday (so I can annoy my family) I realize buying or renting would be almost impossible. Unless I sell a lot more books. When you live in a place with reasonable prices (Springfield, IL for my husband and me), you get used to, well...living comfortably on retirement incomes.

I didn't intend to write a morose post! Perhaps it's a version of be grateful for what you've had and have today.

                                                                *     *     *     *     *

Elaine has set two of her mystery series in Maryland. To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.

What on Earth are We Doing?

By Elaine L. Orr

For the first time since I began the Irish Roots author blog in 2011, I did not post anything during a month (February 2026). If I want an easy excuse I could say it's because I had back surgery on the 19th and it's been tough before and after. (Successful, but not what you want to do for fun.)

While that may be a factor, the bigger issue is that I am overwhelmed by the U.S. actions to start a war that will kill a lot of people and cannot be won. We focus, appropriately, on the US service members who were killed and I wish I could bring them back for their families. We seem to gloss over the fact that we are killing many hundreds of women, children, and men with our bombs and drones. Some are in the military, most are not.

Have we become immune to sorrow because we see killing all the time in movies and on television? Or are we simply trying to ignore bellicose chest-beating from political leaders?

The Secretary of War recently bragged about the March 4th sinking of the Iranian IRIS Dena with a torpedo in international waters off the coast of Sri Lanka. This was the first sinking with a submarine-fired torpedo since World War II. Think about it for a moment. Eighty-seven young men either died immediately or drowned. (The Sri Lankans recovered their bodies.)

These sailors signed up for service in their country's military for some of the same reasons men and women sign up for service in the U.S. They may have been motivated by patriotism but also simply needed a job. They have families who relied on them. They may have had pictures of their children taped to the bunk above theirs in their sleeping quarters just as US submariners do.

I accept that the US military did not purposely bomb a school full of young girls, but lack of intent doesn't make it better. Have you seen the pictures of the girls' bodies separately wrapped in sheets awaiting burial? I can't get that image out of my head any more than I can remove the one of people covered in grit running from the collapsing Twin Towers in 2001.

This is not a game. We are sending our young people into horrific danger and causing the same for millions more. Where is the outrage and sorrow?

Before you think that I'm anti-military, be assured I am not. I visit my parents in Arlington National Cemetery and fly a flag on Memorial and Veterans Day. The two charities to which I give monthly are World Central Kitchen and Armed Services YMCA. In case you've never heard of the latter (and especially if you want to donate), they help "junior enlisted personnel and their family members. The Armed Services YMCA empowers military families, no matter who they are or where they’re from, by ensuring access to resources, relationships, and opportunities for all to grow and thrive." That includes food for families whose budgets can't be stretched far enough.

One of the questions asked of current military and political leaders is if we will run out of bombs and drones. I told my doctor yesterday she needs a magic wand to make growing chronic back issues better. That need pales in comparison with our nation's need to feel empathy for our own service members and those whose lives we end and uproot.

Don't be afraid to pray and cry for an end to the carnage.

                                                                         *  *  *  *  *

Eaine's favorite book (of hers) is Falling Into Place, a story of grace as a World War II vet struggles with his wife's death...and life since he served. To learn more about Elaine's writing, visit her website or sign up for her newsletter.